Thursday, November 3, 2011

grab me by the hand

Forgiveness is a most magical thing. So much freedom in forgiving someone, so much freedom in being forgiven.
Forgiving BH has been incredible. Though my heart is still broken, it's no longer incapacitating. It's beautiful because it was better almost instantly after forgiving him.
Why are we so slow to forgive if THIS is the outcome?
And God is always so quick to forgive. God doesn't need extra time to think about things and cool down. You ask for His forgiveness, you receive His forgiveness. It sets you free.
I'm kind of in awe of the last few weeks of my life. I've gone from awful to wonderful in such a short time that it can only be a God thing. God heals. The Lord is my Healer.
I'm longing to encounter Him in a real way right now. To hear His voice, to feel His touch, to know His love.
Last night at small group, we were talking about prayer as God's invitation to us. Every time I go to prayer, it is Christ knocking at my heart that initiates it. Every time I call to Him in fear, in tears, in joy, in loneliness, in suffering - in any circumstance - it is the Lord reminding me that He is right there and that He is not going to let me go. Ever. (Deut. 31:6). Though I had already come across this concept before, it's no less amazing to me now. God wants to hear from me.
I feel so content and so joyful. I still have a long way to go to mental/spiritual health, but I have no doubt that God can take me there. God WILL take me there.


PS - there is a baby in my church that needs a liver transplant in an absolutely crucial way right now. Her name is Daphne. My small group is praying for a miracle. Please pray.

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