Friday, November 29, 2013

ENFP Confessions #3

Relationships are probably the most important thing in the world to me. I love people in general, and I've been known to tell people that I don't do acquaintances. We either are friends, or we're not friends, and there's no real in between for me. My relationships are part of my identity. In the words of my favourite ENFP...


I have a really hard time letting go of my relationships. The getting to know someone process is incredibly life changing for me with any relationship, particularly deeper relationships. My relationships become a huge part of who I am; it's challenging for me to accept that sometimes the most healthy thing is to take a break from a relationship.

I know this post seems kind of serious, but it's something I'm seriously thinking about tonight. Sometimes, letting go of the things we hold dearest can allow us to be extraordinarily free. 

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

I will!

Two posts in one day! what!?

I just saw this video from one of my favourite video bloggers, and it really inspired and motivated me, so I wanted to share it here!

thoughts for today

Honestly, it's a tough gig to be a girl sometimes. The media puts us in the business of comparison and jealousy - a pressure that makes it challenging to love yourself.

Lately I've been really unhappy with my physical appearance. It's been really weighing me down. I was telling my best friend about how unhappy I am, and he asked me "when do you think you'll be happy with yourself?" 

When I'm perfect.

And let's face it: that day is never going to come. I'm never, ever going to be perfect. The standards I've set for myself are actually completely unattainable. But I can't let go of this feeling that I'll always need to be something better. At what point can I just be happy with who I am? I think it is important to aim for growth, to aim for a better version of yourself, to learn and to be changed by life. But I think it's also important to be happy with yourself at each stage.

How do I re-motivate myself to aim for a healthier life without putting myself through horrible circumstances again? As some of you may know, when I'd lost 70 pounds, I had done a lot of that (at least half) by starving myself. I struggled so much with anorexia and if I ever ate "too much," I would workout ridiculously hard to make up for it. This behaviour was reinforced by everyone telling me how great I looked. I was much more confident, but I was never satisfied.

So this time, I want to make sure I'm doing it the healthy way. It's really easy for me to become uninspired when I don't immediately see results. I don't know how to start over. I don't know how to love myself where I'm at. But these are my thoughts for today.

Saturday, November 2, 2013

ENFP Confessions #2

I'm intensely passionate about an extremely wide array of things... and all of those things don't necessarily go together, either.

Seriously, I'm really hyper-passionate. Sex, faith, singing, education, human rights and social justice, fairtrade, writing, getting to know others... the list goes on. At least there's somewhat of a common element; you can kind of narrow down the list. I really love people!

And I hear a lot of other ENFPs have this struggle too! I regularly wonder if I'll ever decide what I want to be when I grow up. If I ever grow up, that is. It's so hard to figure out what "my thing" is... I guess I both love and hate this about myself. I love that I love so many things. But I also desperately wish that I at least had an idea of what my future would hold.

In the end, I think I'll keep living a life of happiness and love. To be totally honest, as confusing as being hyper-passionate can be, my life is very full of love and joy because of it. So... I think I'll just embrace this hyper-passionate part of myself - it is, after all, a pretty good problem to have.