Private or Public?

Yesterday, Beth Moore kicked my butt again.

"Is your faith more passionate in public, or in your private life?"

...ouch.

I think that's a big item in our walks. Comes back to Jesus reminding us not to let our left hand know what our right hand is doing (Matt 6:3). But it's hard.

Why is it hard for me?

(1) I have troubles receiving encouragement from God. I have trouble receiving His pleasure in me. All I see is sin. But in God's eyes, forgiven sin is behind us. So I shouldn't struggle this way. But I do!

(2) I'm lazy. I was recently struck by something the skit guys said (God to Tommy): "you're really lazy, but you pretend to be really, really busy." man, that hits home! I'm too busy for my prayer life sometimes. I'm too busy to do things God's way sometimes. I'm too busy to serve someone else sometimes. It's dangerous. I'm ashamed that I struggle there.

(3) I need other people to think. That sounds dumb, I know! But I think it's part of the way I was created. I feel things well on my own. But when it comes down to thinking, I need someone to bounce ideas off of. Someone to guide my thinking. I wonder how to let God be that someone!

Any ideas?